Sharing the Gospel

I love this subject and feel like when we are doing this we are fulfilling all that our Heavenly Father wants us to do. I have a sister and cousin who are serving missions right now and then two more of my cousins have their papers in. I am so thankful for these example, and know that all the younger children are looking up to them and wanting to be just like them.

In Mark 14 verse 9 it says: "Verily I say unto you, Wheresoever this gospel shall be preached throughout the whole world, this also that she hath done shall be spoken of for a memorial of her." I know that as these missionaries are out we are able to be so blessed as a family. Every Monday they email. My sister is in Georgia and absolutely loves it. I love her emails and can just feel the power that she feels reading the emails. She has just hit her halfway mark and has had about 11 baptisms. She was in her first area for about 8 months and just fell in love with the people there. She tells such neat stories about people that she is working with and I know that she is where she is supposed to be! 

Here is a picture of my sister, she has the strawberry blond hair with the black shirt. This family that she found was so ready to hear the gospel. She told us that the mom called them as sisters and asked if they could bring a Book of Mormon over because she was really looking for the true church for her children. This is one of the most powerful testimonies of the BOM that I have ever heard. This family was so ready and after having the BOM for just a few days called my sister and told her that she was ready to be baptized. Two weeks later the mom and the two daughters got baptized and a week later the father. This week the father has the opportunity to baptize his son. I truly love this and know that Heavenly Father prepares people and puts certain people in our paths. I am so thankful for missionary work and so thankful for my sweet sister!

Letting go of the Small Things

Gridlocked 

     This is such a strange word, but this does happen in marriages. This is when partners cannot can not find a way to accommodate these perpetual disagreements. I know that my husband and I have been guilty of this before, after arguing about having something a certain way and then finally just giving up and not ever solving the issue, but also not doing anything about it. We all have our stubborn days, a few weeks ago I had a weekend planned out. I really wanted to get up early on Saturday go to the gym, then to breakfast, and then go to the mall of something. My husband had other plans (which he never does on the weekends) he wanted to go to the local gun show and then was going to play basketball with a couple of his friends. We both were being stubborn and would not give in to the other. There was a way that we could compromise and do it all, but instead we gridlocked and just got very upset. I explained that I had looked forward to this all week, and I didn't think that I needed to tell him anything because he NEVER has anything planned and is always asking what we can do on the weekends. He told me that he had no idea I had these big plans and instead of just hanging out at home he wanted to do something. We both experienced gridlock and were being very stubborn. We ended up going to breakfast and then coming home to clean the house, so neither one of us was able to do what we wanted to that day. If we would of had some of these activities suggested in the book written by Gottman, perhaps we could of compromised and we could of had an enjoyable day. SO if you ever experience gridlock I am going to give you a couple activities that might help!

First here are some of the signs of gridlock:
1.  You've had the same argument again and again with no resolution.
2.  Neither of you can address the issue with humor, empathy, or affection.
3.  The issue is becoming increasingly polarizing as times goes on. 
4.  Compromising seems impossible because it would mean selling out- giving up something important and core to your beliefs, values, or sense of self. 

What are some ways that we can overcome gridlock?


Step #1: EXPLORE THE DREAMS
To get started, choose a particular gridlocked conflict to work on. Next you will write an explanation of your postition. What are you trying to relay to your spouse? Try not to criticize or blame your spouse. Then you will write the story of the hidden dreams that underlie your postition. Explain where these dreams come from and why they are so meaningful to you. This will help your spouse better understand your point of view. After you have written you dreams down, each person will have 15 minutes to talk about their point and then 15 minutes to listen to the other speak about their point.  Next is the dream catcher's magic questions. Here are a few.
1. What do you believe about this issue? Do you have some values, ethical ideas, or other beliefes that relate to your position on this issue? 
2. What are all the things you feel about this issue? 
3. What does your position mean to you? 
4. What is your ideal dream here?


Step #2: SOOTHE
When we are discussing our dreams, it can be stressful. We need to make sure that we are paying attention to how our spouse is reacting to the conversation. If we are feeling stressed our self it is important to tell our spouse. We can recall what flooding is, this can occur is we are not careful and then the conversation does not get anywhere. We need to make sure that we soothe our self and our spouse if we can see that frustration is beginning to occur. 


Step #3: REACH A TEMPORARY COMPROMISE 
Now that our spouse knows our dreams and expectations, it is important to begin the task of making peace with this issue, accepting the differences between you, and establishing some kind of initial compromise that will help you continue to discuss the problem amicably. We need to understand that our purpose is not to solve the conflict- most likely it will never go away completely. Instead the goal is to defang the issue, to try to remove the hurt so that the problem stops being a source of great pain. 
Next we need to remember that there are Nonnegotiable areas and there are Areas of Flexibility. 
We all know that each circumstance is different when it comes to this, depending on the argument. There are small things in marriage that can tear us apart if we are not careful and letting go of these things is the best thing that we can do. I can name a few in my own marriage that I need to let go. The first one is my husband will not always look like a model when he leaves the house. The second one, he will always be looking at guns and wanting to add to his collection of guns, and the last one he will never keep is truck shiny and clean. As soon as I started realizing this, I was able to be happier in my marriage because I let go of the small things!!!

Preparing Ourselves

Elder Oaks Second ComingAbove is a link about the second coming, what are we doing now to prepare for the second coming?I personally know that I am not ready for the second coming. There are many things that I need to improve upon to be ready to meet our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I know just like Elder Oaks said that we can accelerate our preparation and help those around us prepare. We have to be missionaries so that we can prepare this world for Christ to come again. A talk given by Neil L. Anderson talks about how we can help prepare for the second coming, here is a few paragraphs from his talk:

" One of your important responsibilities is to help prepare the world for the Second Coming of the Savior.

The Lord has appointed a prophet, President Thomas S. Monson, to direct the work of His priesthood. To you, President Monson has said: “The Lord needs missionaries.”1 “Every worthy, able young man should prepare to serve a mission. Missionary service is a priesthood duty—an obligation the Lord expects of [you] who have been given so very much.”2

Missionary service requires sacrifice. There will always be something you leave behind when you respond to the prophet’s call to serve.

Those who follow the game of rugby know that the New Zealand All Blacks, a name given because of the color of their uniform, is the most celebrated rugby team ever.3 To be selected for the All Blacks in New Zealand would be comparable to playing for a football Super Bowl team or a World Cup soccer team.

In 1961, at age 18 and holding the Aaronic Priesthood, Sidney Going was becoming a star in New Zealand rugby. Because of his remarkable abilities, many thought he would be chosen the very next year for the national All Blacks rugby team.

At age 19, in this critical moment of his ascending rugby career, Sid declared that he would forgo rugby to serve a mission. Some called him crazy. Others called him foolish.4 They protested that his opportunity in rugby might never come again.

For Sid it was not what he was leaving behind—it was the opportunity and responsibility ahead. He had a priesthood duty to offer two years of his life to declare the reality of the Lord Jesus Christ and His restored gospel. Nothing—not even a chance to play on the national team, with all the acclaim it would bring—would deter him from that duty.5

He was called by a prophet of God to serve in the Western Canadian Mission. Forty-eight years ago this month, 19-year-old Elder Sidney Going left New Zealand to serve as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Sid told me of an experience he had on his mission. It was evening, and he and his companion were just about to return to their apartment. They decided to visit one more family. The father let them in. Elder Going and his companion testified of the Savior. The family accepted a Book of Mormon. The father read all night. In the next week and a half he read the entire Book of Mormon, the Doctrine and Covenants, and the Pearl of Great Price. A few weeks later the family was baptized.

A mission instead of a place on the New Zealand All Blacks team? Sid responded, “The blessing of [bringing others] into the gospel far outweighs anything [you] will ever sacrifice.”

You’re probably wondering what happened to Sid Going following his mission. Most important: an eternal marriage to his sweetheart, Colleen; five noble children; and a generation of grandchildren. He has lived his life trusting in his Father in Heaven, keeping the commandments, and serving others.

And rugby? After his mission Sid Going became one of the greatest halfbacks in All Blacks history, playing for 11 seasons and serving for many years as captain of the team.8

How good was Sid Going? He was so good that training and game schedules were changed because he would not play on Sunday. Sid was so good the Queen of England acknowledged his contribution to rugby.He was so good a book was written about him titled Super Sid."

I know and love all the missionaries that are giving their time so that our church can be spread around all the world. My sister and cousin are now serving full time missions, one in Georgia and one in Africa. It truly is amazing to see all the blessings that have come to our family from their service. We all need to do our best to prepare for the second coming, we don't know exactly when it going to happen, but there have been signs that it is coming soon and the more prepared that we are, the better!

Nurturing Our Marriages

 "Marriage brings greater possibilities for happiness than does any other human relationship. Yet some married couples fall short of their full potential. They let their romance become rusty, take each other for granted, allow other interests or clouds of neglect to obscure the vision of what their marriage really could be. Marriages would be happier if nurtured more carefully." This quote by President Nelson sums up how we should look at marriage and what we can do to protect our marriages. 

My husband and I have been married for about 2 and a half years and I know that we have fallen short in times, and there are many things that both of us can improve on. I know that as we continue building our marriage by attending church and regular temple attendance we will have a strong marriage. 

I have talked to my parents and grandparents about things that they do to nurture their marriages and this is what they told me. My parents told me that they make sure that they have time for one another, even when things in their lives get crazy and busy. My parents both have their plates full, so making time for their marriage is a must. I remember growing up my parents were so busy with everything that they had going on in their lives and with us kids that they really didn't go on many dates. Talking to my mom though she talks about how my dad will have to run errands in the day and he always calls her to see if she can come with him and they stop for lunch. Even in their crazy schedules they made sure that they make time for one another. 

My grandparents talk about now as they have gotten older their favorite thing to do together is to feed the cows and do the ranch chores together. I loved this because I feel that when you are working together you really are growing so much together. I know that as I work with my husband I can see our marriage become stronger. I know that as we make time for our spouses and nurture our marriages we will be blessed and our marriage will grow. 

President Nelson says that he suggests three things, to appreciate, to communicate, and to contemplate. Here is how he suggests that you accomplish these three things, "To appreciate—to say “I love you” and “thank you”—is not difficult. But these expressions of love and appreciation do more than acknowledge a kind thought or deed. They are signs of sweet civility. As grateful partners look for the good in each other and sincerely pay compliments to one another, wives and husbands will strive to become the persons described in those compliments.

Suggestion number two—to communicate well with your spouse—is also important. Good communication includes taking time to plan together. Couples need private time to observe, to talk, and really listen to each other. They need to cooperate—helping each other as equal partners. They need to nurture their spiritual as well as physical intimacy. They should strive to elevate and motivate each other. Marital unity is sustained when goals are mutually understood. Good communication is also enhanced by prayer. To pray with specific mention of a spouse’s good deed (or need) nurtures a marriage.

My third suggestion is to contemplate. This word has deep meaning. It comes from Latin roots: con, meaning “with,” and templum, meaning “a space or place to meditate.” It is the root from which the word temple comes. If couples contemplate often—with each other in the temple—sacred covenants will be better remembered and kept. Frequent participation in temple service and regular family scripture study nourish a marriage and strengthen faith within a family. Contemplation allows one to anticipate and to resonate (or be in tune) with each other and with the Lord. Contemplation will nurture both a marriage and God’s kingdom. The Master said, “Seek not the things of this world but seek ye first to build up the kingdom of God, and to establish his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”

Deny Christ NOT

Matt 16:24-25. Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.  25 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.

We know that our loving Savior sacrificed his own life so that we are able to have eternal life. I will forever be eternally grateful for that and the blessings that I receive from him sacrifice.  In a talk given by  Elder D. Todd Christofferson he said, "In giving His life, Christ saved not only His own life but our lives as well. He made it possible for us to exchange what would otherwise have been an ultimately futile mortal life for eternal life."  Elder Christofferson continues, "I wish we had more of the conversation between Jesus and His disciples. It would have been helpful to have some additional light about what it means, in practice, to lose one’s life for His sake and thereby find it. But as I pondered it, I realized that the Savior’s comments just before and after His declaration provide valuable guidance. Let’s consider three of these contextual comments." Elder Christofferson gives us 5 ways that we can lose ourselves and grow closer to Christ.

1. Take Up Your Cross Daily-   “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me” (Matthew 16:24).
2. Confess Christ before Others- A second accompanying statement suggests that finding our life by losing it for the Savior’s sake and the gospel’s sake entails a willingness to make our discipleship open and public.
3. The Cost of Discipleship- It is not a question of love. We can and must love one another as Jesus loves us. As He said, “By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another” (John 13:35).
4. Forsake the World- The third element of losing our lives for the Lord’s sake is found in His words: “For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matthew 16:26).
5. Lose Your Life in His Service-  the greatest illustration of saving one’s life by losing it is this: “O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done” (Matthew 26:42). In giving His life, Christ saved not only His own life but our lives as well. He made it possible for us to exchange what would otherwise have been an ultimately futile mortal life for eternal life.